Monday, July 7, 2008

And the winners are...

Yes my dearies, it's prize distribution time.

The winners of the most scandalous and/or entertaining stories about cheap places to eat at MG road (see comments section of previous post on the same subject) are:

1. The anonymous VAN: For wearing a tie to Koshy's. And for being from cwashtal AndhrPradeshandi.

2. The human bean: For posting 6 comments in 48 seconds.

3. Karen: For spoiling his chances by mentioning multinational food chains.

4. Scribbler: Ladies/Chinese quota.

Consolation prize: Bikerdude, for doing admirable clean up job of majestic loo like usage of comment space.

Honourable mentions:

Nigel Jeejeebhoy: For vivid descriptions of MG Road in the early jurassic period.

Anoushka: Because I already drew her.

Pri: In the hope that she'll get over that ghastly kheer kadam at some point

And the rangashankara crowd: Please do not kill me.

And finally, the prize:
Bonda soup for yevverybody, commaaan yenjaay I say.


Anonymous said...


Nutting like a food fight to get ouru kompetition rrrroling.

Day was komment no. 98 in .3527 secs. Sexu Secsu.

Timepass Monday it is

VAN said...

Abbah tanksandi! Bonda soup and beerkai eppudu? Ekkada?

Scribbler said...

Ohmy! Thank you so much! I am happy to accept this award on behalf of the Association of Ladies, Chineses, ex-local-train-taking-Bombayites, ex-rock-loving-Hyderabadis, new-Bangaloreans-in-South-Bangalore-who-like-Ranga-Shankara, students-of-Kannada, Sandras-from-Bandra-now-in-Bangalore, and Goan-Katlick-rasam-fanciers. But you should have told me you were giving awardsandall, no, I would at least have put on my Sunday best frock and brought y'all some cake!

Maybe we should have Bonda beer soup?

Anonymous said...

@scribbler :)

-rangashankara crowd

VAN said...

@ Scribbler: Congratchlashuns fellow-awardee. Bonda beer soup in Chin Lung sounds jeshtt right I say. Comman!

@BD: Woy anonymous I say...yeverytime name I am writing only no? Yes.

Abhipraya said...

Yes you do deserve an award for managing all those comments dude :) Fun post it was.ppspo

Nileena said...

Sexy competition only it was. Sooper fun to read!

BD: At this rate you will soon have to quit work and spend all your time replying to comments :)

Nileena said...

Oh and congrats to all the bonda soup winners!!

Anonymous said...

Jest vun gratitude I wants to say,re:
all phunny your blogo is. Vairy good living in Bengalooruinda pain reliever it is.

All for wonde roopa Reliance data card costing wonly.

RevaBikerDudea - you get all phull piziest prizeu from gratephull types me.

Most esspeshelly ven I yam driving/scraping through Kaveri UberPass here, your posts make me phull loffing,

Thengu thengu thengu.

Now - cartoon beku saar. Vairy nice is youvar cartoons, yenjaaying much wid bondas

Pri said...

bwahahahaha at ladies/chinese quota.

thenga thenga thenga.

also what for you have done this? karen is going to die and go to heaven. i hope its sindhi soul rests in peace.

Karan said...



Also, really:

bwahahahaha @ ladies/chinese quota.

VAN said...

@BD: Waat you thought I say, giving awardsu and vanishingu? Like Filmfare only it is. Kindly to pass comment to adoring fansu.

kavitha said...

huh, bonda soup wokay wokay for now...but we WANT kadle puri ishtories.hmpf.

@77on7/7: kindly seconding!

Bikerdude said...

Yabba- I cannot able to handle comments at such speed I say- kindly excuse late replies :) But hae what a lovely. Keep em coming I say!

ahumanbean: Some-something andall you will write off I say.
Cartoonaa. Haan wokay. Suddenly I got off tired of drawing. Will resume soon I pwomis.

van: Idhaane VANdaam enguradhu. Guhuhuha. Email maadi for further details. YOu are anonyminous because you have no profile or blog link I say. And what disappearingu I say. Some 10 mins I go to blow my nose after posting and 88.74 comments you will put means what I can do? Is it not?

scribbler: Yes I knew you were minority champignon and this would mean a lot to you and the world at large. Kindly note Sheshamahal is vez rest-o-rent and papleet is not allowed within its hollowed portals. Yes and you mussssst wear frock men.

anon: quiver, quake. Thatnk god I have done needful.

nileena: I think I'll take that bit of advice seriously. This is way more fun!

pri, karen: Heh come we will throw alcohol filled wake for it.
karen, kindly join.

kavitha: lets just say eating kadle puri on barton steps is *very* uncomfortable. Not recommended for the weak-spined :P

NK said...

Just curious but did your MG Road under 50 bucks have the highest number of comments??

nigel jeejeebhoy said...

hello hello: cartoon is back i see. is that anoushka in the cartoon? hmmm i notice you have given her the award, when it was I who had written the piece on erstwhile bangalore. mistaken identity hmmm. anyway, i accept most graciously on behalf of anoushka! (wherever she be). will i have to share my bonda soup with her?

Bikerdude said...

abhipraya: Thanks!

NK: yes it was! madness no?

nigel: Aich!! Sorry Nigel! If it wasnt for the hours I spent drawling anoushka's mathoobanoo I would have substituted her picture with what i think you look like. Nevertheless I shall do so shortly once I have unsprained my finger from too much mouse dragging :P. Anoushka, sorry only half bonda for you.

VAN said...

Jeshtt I yam noteesing 4-wheeled vehical with bo-tie. Fame and faartune at lasht!

Scribbler said...

Ohmy! Such artistic talent you have men! Thank you for the picture! And what knees I have also! All that kneeling and saying novenas in St Patrick's...

anoushka taraporevala said...

biker dude: thanks for the honourable mention. how COULD you have mistaken the comments of one nigel for mine?

it was good to see my picture and what you think i look like. i look quite in the 'pink', do i not?

ps see shabana azmi in the movie pestonjee to see how parsi style sari is worn.

VAN said...

BD: I am naat hauuing profile or blaag link because I am naat hauuing yany tolent to write blaagu. Jeshtt humble baay phram CwashtalAndhraPradeshAndi. Simpleitis.

Bikerdude said...

van: Ah yes congrechulations. And wokay ba dont get tension. Sleep, sleep :)

scribbler: Yes yes lots of praying means knobbly knobbly knees getting men.

anoushka: Err yes, fascinating as the subject is, I will try and watch and correct accordingly :P

Anonymous said...

:) :) :)

Eees *very* good, thengu thengu thengu! Much I like! And esss ve all look ejhactly like that I say!

Vun think I know for sure: no XY chromosome knows how any saree is tied. No Boy. Even experts who living in sin with ladies many years not knowing which saree where going pa.

Really I look like dat, no kidding. Except when I am sun-roasted, den I looku like kaapi burnt bean ;)

Nice nice.

Pri said...

hehe why things are growing on karen's face? also thanks for making me look like that wrestler aunty who failed gender test.

nileena said...

*whistles* sooper legs the humanbean has :)

was this pic added later or did i miss it the first time i read the post??

Anonymous said...

sexy no, Nileena? Daily I run around 'op scothcing over/under/side.der Bengalooru's bluddy open drains a k a sidewalks I say.

So - sexy leggs I got.

We 'ave vun national treasure in BikerRevaDude's talents I say.

Twree cheers hic I say

PS you say previous post commentsu? 100+ now ;0

Nileena said...

ahumanbean:..yeah sexy knees only BD has drawn.hic? celebrating victory a?? :)
BD: actually joblessly planning to do that printout thing that someone mentioned, to check out all the places on MG road one by one

Bikerdude said...

ahumanbean: Seeeee I had a feeling about that. And hello we have established that I am chromosome-filled, remember? Err yes, Karen has hastened process by saying 95, 96, 97 itseems mad.

pri: Aiyo that is airlines hotel crow poop on karens face ma. And very saary you don't feature in this diagram. Owing to lack of space and not knowing how to draw you. Nesht time I will attempt ok va? Pomfret holding ladies is scribbler.

nileena: Took a while drawing it so solpa late happened off sorry. Ah please print out. Other suzzestions also I will give.

Pri said...

uff i thought pomfret was disco. sniff.

kavita said...

ahumanbean looks preggie. by the by anoushka & scribbler are giving ore the "corner eye look" at BD eh eh? :P

vaanderful drawings BD... clap,clap,clap!

Anonymous said...

:) @ Kavitha:

I yam Thomas Beatie.
Boy who gaving birth, right right! But I'm still flattered to be cartooned by ouwar wery own Bengaloooru Boys.

*Vat* an *h*onour I say I say.


BikerDudetteBoys: esss esss I yam now sure you are XY wonly. Zimbly I like taking the piss as they say in that bluddy blighty place, you ken! ;0

In plain Bengalooru English: I have joblessly notisings that no male knows how a saree is tied, and certainly has jero number clue about how to depict a saree. I thinkg it has summmthang to do with visual arts vs. wimmins' practical artsu...

Zimble test: ask any random male peepuls to draw a ladies wearing a (normal S. Indian drape) sarees.

I betcha 1/50 vill git it correctu! I betcha two bondas, not jesst vun bondas! Wid chutneys too! (Ayyyo vat a speshel speshel prizzzej I say)

*Ergo* : I 'af proven BD to be vun authentic boysa.

As for me...aaaaah. I stilll checking, saar!

kavitha said...

lol@ahumanbeans Bee-di Boy theory.

Bikey might slack at the saaareee but he gets it more than right on the choli part. total (b)lousu paaarty he is. *scoots before BD throws things at her*

Scribbler said...

Please note that I am very suspicious of the sudden crowd in the picture, hence the expression. It is beginning to look Vidyarthi Bahavan on a Saturday evening (the paaplet feels a little out of place).

OOooh, I see, VAN is a table!

As for men and drawing sarees, I will bet fifty-nine bondas that most of them will draw them as though they are drawing a version of the percentage sign.

Anonymous said...

Vhile ve good peepuls wait, breath held, for Wrong Honorable ArseMinister for Kultural Affairs and Other Affairs to arrive to do Prize Disssht-but-shenu, the eBay value of Prizings has gonings as so/ arse-so:

BD Offerings: maybe vun number bonda

ahumanbean with phull sexxxxy leggsu upping to *two* numbers bondas I say! Wid *chutneys* I say!

now scribbler-wid-paaplit: offering pipty-nice bondas (but widout chutneys cost-saving-exercicesu)

Bikerappa: wonly I requested kartoon of youvar goodself of Bengalore kadais, not us bluddy useless timespass kommentators. But you kindly oblidged wid our Family Jewels Portraits.

Now see how much bonda value our Majjjstick Loo 'as become!

Pipty-Nine bondasa!

Like Tounty-Seven Goan Dresses!

Vairy good paisa vassol this is!

Bikerdude said...

pri: worry naat I say, you are now available in rogues gallery wearing commercial street gold colour aunty bag. Thank you.

kavitha: Yes miss chest-fetish, hello :)

ahumanbean: yes yes thank you very much. Sorry not knowing how to draw (or tie) saree. Will do the needful and oblige.
Yes and thank you for deluze of commentations. PS: Bonda soup cannot be consumed with chutney. For this aloo bonda is required. Jhusst I am saying mins.

scribbler: Ah yes percentage sarees. love those! Guhuhahaha. Also will kindly reply to your kind query this kind evening.

bananaiguana said...

Holy shit this is the funniest and yet strangely educational blog ever! cheers, bikerdude...

Nileena said...

Yabba! one BD fan club only this is !! Soon, new blog post days will resemble the opening day of Thalaivar's movies with virtual coconut breakings ang abkishekams and everything :)

PS: beware BD, the commments section of your blog is in danger of acquiring an identity of its own!

VAN said...

@Nileena: Whatte idea I say!

@BD: woy don't you put aal caamentsu as main blog post, and put your post in the comments window? He he he. And not replying to mailaa? Yuvarself only aksed me to send no? Yes?

Anonymous said...

:) too good i say.
lovely ideas all the commenters haave.

hilarious only.

make one picture of anonymous also know. jus ur imaginations...

Anonymous said...


I yam thinking ve all commentators need to jessht lay off Bikerdude for a bit. Too much pressure is putting on him I say.

Now yevery Taam, Dikshit, HariStores, Anunimuss, jessht *yeverybody* vill vant their pikcher on a BD cartoon I say.

BD: you be charging vun bonda per every cartoon depiction I thinkgs.

Now vhere to I vill courier aloobonda widout chutneys? Wogay vill sending it to:

V K G H 13th Mainu
12 / 3981A / BWSSB DugUp Cross
(next Veena Stores)
(behind Guava Uncle's garden)
Blogger World
Bengalooru - 34,136,5738,e5637

Anita said...

Guys guys guys...I think we are in danger of scaring our BD here...fulll commentsoi-commentsuu...

oodi-hogbidthane paapa...!!

kavitha said...

@bikey: yes yes fetish thanne...for ones such as christian bale xy typesu.:P

ps: i've never tasted this bonda shoupu.

Anonymous said...

ok, Bitterness is a root that ruins the garden of peace.

Lets all make frenz and be glad.

No anonymous pics, tamarind face will do for all the anonymouses.

-on behalf of anonymouses

Bikerdude said...

bananaiguana: Thanks men :)

nileena: Aha. Maybe I will grow T Rajender like beard also :P
And yeah, it certainly is!!

van: Bleddy fellow what you think I say, this is your fathers ancestral blog or what? Actually youre right these comments are more intersting than my choththe posts. Also: Idu thaane VANdaam engurathu = This only don't want I am saying (pun on word VAN)) ok? ok.

amonyminous 1&2: Your picture is available in previous post I say, didnt see aa? Oh musht be begas it is anonymous. Tamarind face eh? heh heh.

beanieboy(girl?): Whatabeauty addrrrss I say. Kindly courier to same place :P

anita: Odi-hogi-vaapas bande owing to being solpa zobless these days. Aiyo and bonda soup not tasteda? Please rectify instantly.

maami said...

bonda soup-a?

Scribbler said...

Uncle, I got address! Thanking you kindly.

VAN said...

In terms of (length of blogpost/number of caamentsu) ratio this one must be best, I say...Jeshtt 21 lines and 47 caamentsu aalready!

Ayyo senti ayyipokandi saaru. Sare sare. Nee bloge idi.

Anonymous said...


I vented to lokal posht oppice. Bought vun number Gandhi stamp - phull 5 paisa it costed me pa.

Posht Master saar telling me his postwomans ladies cannot jump over DugUp Cross and has to take vun number auto to cross Sampige Road roadworks.

Vatodo I thot?

Courier peepuls all vating 5 bondas each to deliver youvar vun bonda I say.

Scratching headu. Vat to do - ve need vun rollercoaster flyover to deliver to youvargoddselfs.

So - I vill sending after flyover ready, I 'hope sincerely that is wokay saar.

By den eBay valueing vill be 4000 bondas so you vill get v. good paisa vasool :) :) :)

Looking forward to your next post - about Bengalooru.


Alexis Meade

Anonymous said...

Alexis was Alex, you know dat no?! Goodu good!

Zimbly I horrt great writers I say. And Alexis was verrrry vell written ;)

Anonymous said...


Scribblers Inc said...

loads of prizes I say...

Me khome to bengalooru too!!

Scribblers Inc.

Bikerdude said...

maami: vango vango :)

van: heh heh yes. i think i can get used to this :P

Garbanzo Govindaswami (Govindamma) (humanbeanu): Hopefully bondae (note plural) will be in eatabull condison when they reach me, otherwise kindly despatch next batch. Yes, Alex IS meading me tomorrow at 7:30. (And this has to be the comment with the maximum number of brackets)

anonymous: congratulations and same to you :)

scribblers inc: Come off to Blr I say! PS, since everyone is being random I just noticed the ponytail in your pic - supercool man :) said...

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